Terrell Owens Signed To One Year, $6.5M Deal by Bills Only Hours Before T.O. Announces Desire for Short-Term, Below-Market Contract with Lousy Team

In a stunning coincidence that occurred only a few hours after being signed by Buffalo to a one-year deal worth a mere $6.5 million, controversial ex-Cowboy Terrell Owens held a press conference to announce his strong desire to secure a short-term, below-market contract with a losing franchise. "I've played for the glamorous, winning teams," said Owens, wearing a red baseball cap that bore the image of a stylized, leaping herbivore, possibly a bison. "I've signed the long-term, big-money contracts--been there, done that. What I want now is a short-term deal for less money with a perennial also-ran, preferably in a low-profile city near the Canadian border where the frequent snow and icy gusts of wind would significantly reduce my productivity."