Area Teen Drains Non-Renewable Energy From Two Electronic Devices While Delivering Environmentalist Rant

Green lifestyle advocate Christen Philips, 17, launched an impromptu assault on the eco apathy of her family and friends for several hours yesterday with an impassioned salmagundi of Socratic method, child psychology, and ad hominem attacks that ended as suddenly as it began when the batteries of her iPhone and Blackberry finally gave out. No stranger to dubious environmental activism, Philips recently spearheaded a successful campaign to cut down a dozen 200-year-old White Oak trees that had been significantly reducing the efficiency of the county library's roof top solar panels, and is currently spending her afternoons driving her mom's GMC Denali Yukon around town collecting signatures for a petition seeking harsher penalties for local recycling compliance violations.